Archive for June, 2011

Websites that help men deceive women to get laid

I never knew they existed either. However, on one of the forums I look in on, a guy showed up today from one of these sites.

It seems that guys who have no luck bedding women because they are lower down in life’s pecking order, and thus not very interesting to women, now have another tool at their disposal. Sites that assist them to deceive women.

Now we have all seen the sites and videos for these “pick up artist” type guys. But this goes a step beyond that. This site creates an online identity for you so a girl can Google you and think you are some big shot. The site in question is called and here is a little of their blurb:

Instead of telling a woman you are in a dead-end job, you can tell them you are an executive in an international company. You will be listed on the company’s executive directory, have your own PBX extension with a greeting recorded by your “executive assistant” that can be forwarded to your cell phone. You will have your own corporate e-mail and we can make it so when people search your name on Google, Yahoo, Bing, etc… , they will be impressed with what they find. There is much, much more, but we can’t give away all our trade secrets, now, can we?

So basically, this is a website set up to help those on the lower rungs of life appear as if they are Donald Trump, and the Ferrari just happens to be in the shop for repair I guess. It is alleged that this service will assist the lesser-gifted mortals in society gain access to the pants of otherwise unobtainable women.

Read the topic for yourself, why not go and join the forum and join the discussion?

You can find it here: How I dated a Hottie

Greater Manchester Police Camera Cars

Let’s talk about Greater Manchester Police’s camera cars. These little buggers have recently sprung up all over the place. They are growing like cellulite on a fat girls thighs.

Very often on my drive toward central Manchester down the A57 Hyde Road, I see one of these parked up. They are very often to be found lurking on the pavement at Reddish Bridge snooping on the oncoming traffic. Going the other way, they lurk on the pavement on the M67/M60 roundabout at Denton (Sorry Rozzers – I feel the public should know).

This must be the new sharp end of policing in Greater Manchester. Pay a guy to sit on his fat arse half the day and snoop on passing traffic. Really, do the police have nothing better to do than cough up thousands of pounds each (of our money) for these things? They must generate more money than they cost or else we would not be seeing them everywhere. That means, you and I dear reader, are paying our local taxes to be snooped upon by the Old Bill so they can harangue us through the mail for money for various non-offences.

Observe the sneaky camera located on the roof of the car. It is helpfully highlighted above by an arrow in case your peepers are not too keen.

So what are these latest manifestations of the Big Brother State all about? Well, of course, they are about raising some cash for the Old Bill. I am not 100% sure which dreadful crimes against humanity these things are designed to capture. No doubt they will be ANPR enabled, which means they check your number plate against the DVLA database and that allegedly tells them if you are insured and taxed. Probably they have the capability to detect such heinous crimes as not wearing a seatbelt, which I got a demand for recently for sixty quid having been photographed by some covert police operative. You even get a photo of yourself through the mail to prove to you what a danger to society you really are.

Does it stop astonished-looking and totally clueless Nigerian asylum seekers drifting from lane to lane aimlessly in an old dented Rover? No, not at all. That would take actual Rozzers in a real traffic car. Not these little pen pushers in their low-budget “Smart Cars”. Those things have lawnmower engines are and not capable of a hot pursuit. The real cops are stuck at the station filling in 276 health and safety forms – in triplicate – for the EU, rather than doing some actual policing.

How embarrassing must it be at a barbecue to have someone ask you “What do you do?” and you reply “I sit in a Smart Car all day photographing people to raise money from hapless motorists” I wonder? Probably those guys prefer to use a macho term like “traffic enforcement” to make themselves feel better about what they do. Saying, “I sit with a camera all day on a verge hoping to catch Mrs Mablethorpe with a two day out-of-date tax disc” is not too ego enhancing.

What does this stuff cost us? Well, the guy in the car must cost us £25k a year (perhaps more with pensions and other stuff). Add to that the £10k or so for the Smart Car. What must the camera and equipment cost? Ten grand? Then there is all his insurances and associated costs. On top of that will be a multitude of Quango outfits that will need to “certify” the camera at regular intervals. Servicing and uniforms…. triplicate EU form filling…..other stuff I forgot…..lets add £10k for all that. These things must cost us £55,000 a year each. At least.

Now these guys have generous holidays no doubt; being in the public sector. So minus weekends, paternity leave, holidays, classes as to why you should give a black man with a wrap of crack outside a school the benefit of the doubt, sick leave, team bonding weekends, ethnic diversity education seminars, etc., they likely only really work half the year in reality. That means each of those cars has to earn £300 a day just to break even. Now, out of this revenue they collect, there will be a deduction for the Central Ticket Office to myther people for the money, a cut for the courts, probably the council, defaults and non-payers to consider, various other deductions for numerous other government departments you never knew existed……… so, we can safely double that. So we are at £600 a day.

Now, they need to make a profit. Anything less than 100% wouldn’t work. It is more likely 200% or 300%, but lets run with a mere 100% for arguments sake. That means each car must generate £1200 a day. If the average fine is £60, that means only 20 tickets a day. Actually, it more likely means 20 tickets a shift. The Rozzers work on eight hour shifts, so that means only 2.5 tickets an hour. That means one every 24 minutes. And you can bet your arse that these guys will be targeted for something well beyond that. So that means that little Jackass sat in that comedy car on the pavement must find something to fine someone for every fifteen or twenty minutes or he misses his target and doesn’t get his invite to the policeman’s ball this year.

Isn’t this country a sad place to live in if we are reduced to this? I think so.

What do you know about these camera cars? Do you have them where you live? Lets talk! Use the comment box below to tell the world.

The Dyson Vacuum Cleaner Forums Newsletter

Hello MVacs,

As a member of the Dyson Forums, we just wanted to take an opportunity to bring you up to date with a few happenings, a few special offers and a handful of other things that may be of interest to you.

Although the forums were only recently added to our site, they have already drawn 225 members in a short space of time. We want to develop our forums into a vibrant and friendly online community that is both an excellent information resource and a place to chat about everything Dyson. We would like to see people from the public and the trade participating. Those in the trade who do not seek to directly compete with us (repair shops not in the North West of England for example) are welcome to a signature link and an entry in our “Worldwide Dyson Resources” section.

With a view to increasing particpation on the forums, today we opened a discussion about a periodical forum competition. Everybody likes something for nothing right? Read the topic and give us your opinions here: Any Interest in a Forum Competition?

We know a lot of guys read the forum here who are in the Dyson business. You might be market traders, car-booters or have a small Dyson specialist shop elsewhere in the UK or overseas. We have decided to try to cut some deals with smaller traders. You can read the topic here: Dyson Parts Trade Deals Available.

Have you seen the Dyson Airblade hand dryers? The ones that are typically around £1000 to buy? We made a deal on some recently and they have been selling well. We only have two left. If you are interested in one, take a look at the topic here: Dyson Airblade AB03 Silver Hand Dryers in Stock – £599

If you are in need of a Henry-type vacuum cleaner, we have been running a special offer for a few months on some commercial specification “Quickclean” machines. We are down to our last few now, and we probably wont bother buying any more as the suppliers recently put the price up. The stock we have, we bought last year before the VAT went up, and before the price increase, so our price of just £99 including DHL delivery will not be repeated. If you want to read more about them, take a look here: Special Offer: Brand New Commercial Tub Vacuums – Better Than a Henry.

Do you have a favourite Dyson? Did you vote in our poll? Here is the link: Poll — Which is your favourite Dyson? Vote Now! Up to now, the DC07 is in the lead with 36% of votes. If you havent voted already, we want your vote!

Our member Russ is asking about DC05 extension poles and stripping them down. Do you know about this? If so, why not reply his topic here: DC05 Extension Pole….again

Do you know anything about Dyson washing machines? Why not join in the discussion here: Dyson washing machine.

Are you a DC07 expert? Here is a topic for you: DC07 cleaner head pivot problem. Our member Laturb has got no replies on that topic yet. Why not help him out if you can?

And last but not least, we work quite hard to make sure people can find us on Google. But we like to know how you found us originally. Was it a link from another site? Was it from Google? Was it from an email or a recommendation? Tell us. Here is the topic: New Members – How did you find us?

Thanks for reading. You are receiving this newsletter as a member of the Dyson Forums. Don’t worry, you wont be getting three a week; nor will your details be passed to any other organisation or entity. But, we would love to see you as an active partcipant on our forums. Why not drop by and say hello?


The Dyson Discussion Board Team.

071411 and 903756 Dyson Offers – Dyson Trade In Deals

Looking for the Dyson offers? Searching online for Dyson 071411 and Dyson 903756? Check here!

There are many offers available for end-of-line or discounted Dysons on the internet. Many offer you a trade in on your old vacuum cleaner.

Many of the new Dysons on sale at shops like Currys are end-of-line, outdated or unpopular models. They are on sale for a reason. Before you invest a lot of money in a Dyson vacuum cleaner, you need comprehensive advice from Dyson experts about which machine suits your needs.

The young guys with product-laden spiky hair that you will find in most large shops have not the faintest idea what Dyson is suitable for your needs. They will likely spend a few minutes torturing you with reflexive pronouns such as “is it for yourself?” and ending every question with “at all”, and not really give a hoot what you buy as long as they get their commission.

There is another way if you are looking for a Dyson. You don’t need to drag your thirty year old Hoover down there and beg for a “trade in” discount either (they only throw them in the skip out the back anyway – that’s just a marketing gimmick).

You don’t even need to leave the house for that matter, because DHL will deliver your new Dyson to you. Oh yes, and you’ll save a pile of cash too. Sound interesting?

It gets better: You will not be buying an appliance that has been shipped from Malaysia and you will be very, very green!

Want to know how? You buy the same model from Dyson specialists online instead of spiky-haired teenagers on commission. You buy a professionally reconditioned one, having read proper advice, and save money!

Is the USA Trying to Censor the Internet by Stealth?

I read an article today about S.968 which is the proposed Protect IP Act introduced by Senator Patrick Leahy. It was designed to “provide the Justice Department and rights holders with important new tools to crack down on rogue websites dedicated to infringing activities,” Senator Leahy said during his introduction of the bill.

However, the tools suggested are directed not against the illegal sites, but against “specified U.S. based third-parties, including Internet service providers, payment processors, online advertising network providers and search engines.”

It allows a court to decide which websites can and cannot be accessed and which results Google (and others) is allowed to return.

Lets get that right. The government wants to control the internet, yes? Naturally, associated financial transactions are included.

As the commentator William Jackson observed recently:

“All well and good. Few are likely to come out in favor of trademark and copyright infringement. But this does not justify the totalitarian approach taken in his bill. In essence, Leahy is repeating the oft-heard refrain of law enforcement and government officials: “My job would be so much easier if I didn’t have to worry about civil liberties and personal rights!”

He is spot on.

Reading between the lines on that article, this is the start of the US trying to control what people can and cannot see on the internet. Its not altogether surprising, and it will take many years to come to its real intended purpose. But as with IMBRA, it will be ushered in to “protect” people, and then seeds will float off from it, and some will take root, as they have done with IMBRA by using its offshoots to attack the mail order bride industry.

Ultimate control of citizens is many governments’ aim. Some do it by dictatorships and communism; some do it by stealth, incrementally, under the guide of “protecting” someone or something. Intellectual Property is a good enough place to start. The IRS cannot tax free downloads so lets hit the “pirates” first eh?

The internet is relatively free and uncensored at the moment. Or so we think. Sites that want total free speech must host in Russia, Sweden or certain Asian or South American countries. In other words, the last bastions of the free world. However, the US controls much of the world’s DNS and can switch sites off at random (as we saw with Wikileaks). It takes dedicated techs to keep a site like Wikileaks afloat.

There was a time, several years ago, when this site was under threat of lawsuits from the US because of content hosted here. We were all poised to move hosting to Russia and/or host at multiple locations simultaneously, but the situation was diffused at the last minute. That said, we still get frequent legal threats from those who are not happy with something or other that is written here. My policy of not deleting stuff others find inconvenient, and digging my heels in when challenged, has not helped us stay out of trouble, but it has helped us gain and maintain credibility.

However, the internet wouldn’t function properly without Google. Google is a US company and that means it is subject to the whims of the US government eventually. The government has more money than Google, so they will win eventually. But it will take time.

An interview with James Dyson

James Dyson has made millions by allowing us to see the dirt we suck up. As he calls for more inventors, Lucy Siegle asks him about manufacturing abroad, design disasters and whether he could build a nuclear reactor.

I am at Dyson HQ in Malmesbury, Wiltshire, the beacon of British industrialism, which is not a dark satanic mill but all light, contoured glass and bridges over placid water between sculptures. This is the birthplace of the bagless, see-through vacuum cleaner that offers 100% suction (so well known it need only be referred to as “the Dyson”) and the planet’s most powerful hand dryer, the Airblade. Bright young engineers emerge from testing rooms wearing non-business dress (an informal rule) and mingle in the sunshine. People are smiling and holding lattes from the shiny canteen. I’m starting to wish I’d listened harder in science classes.

“I was hugely encouraged recently to hear that 13% of girls in school now actually want to become scientists,” says Dyson. He has the wiry build of a long-distance runner and a look of Nigel Havers. And he bounds up the stairs in polka-dot Yamamoto trainers. “OK, so 37% still want to become models, but 13% are aspiring to be scientists!” He stops. “But then I discovered that they all wanted to be pathologists because of that TV show, CSI.” For every problem, James Dyson suspects there is a solution waiting to be designed. So he spends a few minutes contemplating a drama series that could similarly shift engineering in the aspirations of teenage girls.

“Of course there was that film about a chap who invented the windscreen wiper then allegedly got ripped off,” he says; I think of the 2008 film Flash of Genius. “Then he won some money, which went on the horses. Actually the film was more about the horses than it was about the invention. Same with Howard Hughes. His engineering activities are rather interesting, actually, but the film centres on his drug taking and so on,” he laments.

Hughes was also, famously, a recluse. Dyson is not. He has become as well known for his robust opinions as for the bagless cleaner. “The media thinks that you have to make science sexy and concentrate on themes such as rivalry and the human issues. But just look at the viewing figures for Tomorrow’s World. They were phenomenal, and that just showed pure technology. You don’t need to sex things up. These subjects [technology and engineering] are sexy in their own right.”

Although I spent my childhood happily watching Judith Hann and team riding around in Sinclair C5s, I have a hunch that this next generation is more demanding. But, in an effort to inspire the next crop of engineers and designers, he is running the 2011 James Dyson Award through his eponymous foundation. The last winners to bag the £10,000 on offer to develop their invention – plus £10,000 towards their university education – were Yusuf Muhammad and Paul Thomas, who came up with a way to adapt kitchen taps to respond to domestic fires, thereby minimising casualties and deaths.

You wonder if these young innovators know what’s headed their way. Because becoming an inventor also seems to mean opening yourself up to the possibility of betrayal. “At some point you’re going to feel ripped off,” says Dyson. One of his early inventions was the Ballbarrow – a wheelbarrow centred on a large, pneumatic red ball that gave it stability and made it easier to steer. And it was this odd-looking wheelbarrow that afforded the first professional “betrayal” when Dyson’s business partners, having become majority shareholders, sold the invention to a US manufacturing firm that wrote Dyson out of the equation.

“If you invent something, you’re doing a creative act,” says Dyson. “It’s like writing a novel or composing music. You put your heart and soul into it, and money. It’s years of your life, it’s your house remortgaged, huge emotional investment and financial investment. The Ballbarrow was just the start. Terrible things happen all the time with the vacuum cleaner. People copy it. Society allows and encourages it. But it is theft, and I wish courts and society regarded it as such. Theft or rape, that’s what it’s like.”

Perhaps to relieve an awkward pause after the rape reference, he is up on his feet collecting a series of components to demonstrate the inner workings of the Dyson. His enthusiasm and ability to humanise the workings of the materials and the structure is infectious (next day I find myself googling magnets to find out what they are actually made from). But in the corner of his office, filled with different evolutions of the vacuum, I also spy an example of a Dyson failure: theContrarotator, a double-drum washing machine that never took off. “It was too expensive to make.” He pauses. “We should have charged more for it, then it would have been a great success, probably.” The inventor is seemingly at ease with failure. “I have failures all day long, every day. I made 5,126 prototypes for the Dyson vacuum. All failed until number 5,127.”

And what a winner number 5,127 proved to be, arguably the totemic aspirational consumer product of our times, catapulting Dyson into Rich List territory. It didn’t just suck up dirt efficaciously; it became a cultural signifier. In the Royle Family Christmas Special, Barb is moved to exclaim: “Ooh Valerie. What a Christmas! Implants and a Dyson!”

“Yes, and there’s also a bit when Jim says: ‘I can’t even afford a bloody Dyson,'” says the inventor, looking quite delighted. In a time when British retail, from fashion to garden furniture, all seems to be about discounting and cheap-as-chips products with the excuse that this somehow democratises consumer goods by making them “affordable”, Dyson is strikingly comfortable about his brand being perceived as expensive. “It’s a consequence of spending so much on R&D. It’s expensive. And I refuse to design down to a cost.”

In fact he scorns the idea of a brand at all. “I don’t believe in brands. Here, we believe people should only buy because they want a vacuum cleaner that does what ours does. I know we sell a lot of Dysons to poor people. They regard it as a significant investment. Someone who is less well-off is more likely to take an interest in their vacuum cleaner. The well-off just say: ‘Oh, the cleaner deals with that.'”

But isn’t this all a bit overengineered, I wonder. I think of my own vacuum, a simple canister on wheels: I’ve never found its reliance on bags or lack of suction cause for concern. “Are you competitive about other hoovers, like the one I have? It’s red and black with big eyes and a smile,” I ask him. Dyson is cool. “I’m not going to comment on competitors. I know exactly which one you mean. We do what we do: do away with bags, 100% suction. Henry can do what it wants.”

Dyson does not have a problem speaking his mind, or indeed being heard, and he’s done a good job of keeping the topic of industrial design in the news. Take his recent suggestion that Chinese students were stealing intellectual property from UK universities, which caused a minor storm. “What that article was really about was the tragic situation that 80% of postgraduate students are non-British. It is great to have more undergraduates doing science, but for blue-sky research – important risky research that translates into new technology which we can sell to the rest of the world – we need them to stay on and do postgraduate research. This is not xenophobia – it’s the simple fact that we need postgraduate scientists here to create wealth. That’s my point, more than the theft of intellectual property from universities.”

So is there a problem with the thieving of intellectual property from British universities by Chinese students? “Well, I’m told there is. Yes. I have heard of a few instances. Of course it may not be confined to the Chinese.”

Ultimately the thing that appears to drive the inventor of the fastest electric motor in the world is a desire to reboot manufacturing in the UK. “When I was growing up, the balance of trade was on the news every night because it was of such desperate concern. Now it’s so bad it’s disappeared entirely. If we import more than we export, we’re a declining economy.” But you moved your manufacturing base overseas, I venture. “No, I didn’t,” he says. “You did. In 2002,” I refer to the newspaper cuttings of the time. “No, I didn’t. I moved my assembly. And that’s because they wouldn’t let me expand over there,” he gestures towards a large house, the head office of a construction company.

It’s a careful distinction – to the lay person, assembly is part of manufacturing, and the media lamented the loss of 800 “manufacturing jobs” at the time. In 2009 there was a similar tussle with the Environment Agency over a proposed Dyson academy in Bath which never happened. (The Environment Agency claimed the proposed site was a flood plain, and plans were dropped. Much was made of the fact that the Labour government ran with plans for a “rival” academy with Peter Jones of Dragons’ Den.)

He does, however, seem to feel that this government speaks his language. He has written a report for David Cameron on increasing Britain’s technology exports. He gives George Osborne a “big thumbs-up” for what he sees as the right tax breaks for entrepreneurs in the recent budget. “I feel optimistic. But then I am an optimist,” he says.

Is he happy with his achievements? The bagless vacuum cleaners, the Ballbarrow, the new bladeless fan – all exciting for the consumer, but considering Dyson’s interest in the big themes such as energy policy and climate change, doesn’t he ever want to solve a problem bigger than vacuuming? Is, for example, the Dyson nuclear reactor (he is a fan of nuclear and solar) in development? “Goodness, I know nothing about nuclear energy.” I point out that he knew nothing about vacuum cleaners either. “True. I knew nothing about anything. I did classics at school and went to college to do design and then got interested in engineering. My limit is a terrific interest in technology.”

Given that he is essentially an autodidact who has made millions, why is there so much emphasis on making highly trained engineers out of the rest of us? “Well, I couldn’t have made that motor,” he says, gesticulating to the innards of a Dyson. “In fact I can’t do three-quarters of the work we do here. For that I need highly trained scientists.”

And when can we see your next invention, I ask. “When it’s ready!” And with that, Dyson’s chief engineer bounces off to the R&D laboratory.


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