How to Persuade Your Wife or Girlfriend to Wear Stockings

By | July 25, 2023

So you want to know how to persuade your wife or girlfriend to wear stockings? Men are complaining all over the internet that their wives or girlfriends won’t wear stockings for them. Wanting your girl to dress sexily for you is a natural and healthy thing.

My (now) wife and every single girlfriend that preceded her, back into the 1980s (and without boasting chaps, there were quite a lot of them), were all more than happy to wear stockings for me. Every. Single. One. Of. Them. Without argument or objection. Many had never worn them before. I think that qualifies me to opine on the subject a bit.

If she is reluctant, the word I want to emphasise here is persuade. Not pressure, nag, moan, argue, complain or bitch at her about it. You’ll get nothing that way. Persuasion comes about not overnight, and by a process not dissimilar to closing a sale. You need to be a salesman. But not a pushy one.

Salesmen close a sale by skillfully overcoming objections, making the ‘product’ seem appealing, and clearly explaining the benefits it offers. They address any concerns the ‘customer’ may have, highlight the unique features, and emphasise how the purchase will enhance their life or solve a specific problem, ultimately leading the customer to make the decision to ‘buy’.

Stocking tops in the pub

Introducing stockings into your relationship with your wife or girlfriend can be a wonderful way to explore new avenues of excitement, intimacy and add an element of elegance and allure to your connection. But remember, when it comes to gently persuading her, open conversations and respect are the keys – no pressure needed. In this article, we’ll delve into this topic together and address all the factors mentioned to help you on your journey.

Understanding Her Reluctance

Before we dive into the art of persuasion, it’s essential to empathise with her feelings and concerns, they may include:

  • Comfort Worries: Stockings might be unfamiliar territory for her, leading to concerns about comfort and fit.
  • Body Image Insecurities: She may worry about how stockings will complement her body, especially if she’s not used to wearing them.
  • Misconceptions and Stereotypes: Unfortunately, stockings have sometimes been associated with negative stereotypes like hookers and porn stars, making her hesitant to give them a try.
  • Fiddly to attach suspender straps? You’ll get on your knees and do it, right? She might like that.
  • Feminism: Wearing something ‘just’ to please a man? Forget it!

Let’s Cover Feminism

Learning how to persuade your wife or girlfriend to wear stockings can be hampered by feminism. The idea that ‘modern women’ don’t do stuff to please their men, blah blah. They’ve had it drilled into them by the left and the woke since school. If she is big into feminism or maybe pounding the keyboard on Mumsnet every night, try introducing this idea into your conversation to blow that apart: (people not affected by feminism, skip to after the next picture).

From a feminist perspective, the notion of “pleasing a man” might initially raise concerns about perpetuating traditional gender roles or compromising one’s autonomy. However, empowering feminism acknowledges that true empowerment lies in embracing the freedom to make choices, even if they align with a partner’s desires. In this context, pleasing a man can be viewed as an assertion of agency, as long as it is a consensual and authentic expression of one’s own desires. In embracing the power to decide what brings joy and satisfaction to oneself and one’s partner, a feminist can redefine the act of pleasing as an empowering and mutually fulfilling experience, demonstrating that feminism can embrace diverse expressions of agency and empowerment.

How to Persuade Your Wife or Girlfriend to Wear Stockings

In other words: a feminist, who might not naturally be inclined to do something to “please a man” might actually find pleasing the man gives her power. So doing what a man wants is actually quite feminist after all. Think of all that sexual power at her command if she wears stockings! I bet you’ll load the dishwasher, mow the lawn and take the bins out then.

Gentle Persuasion and Empathetic Conversations

Now, let’s explore how to approach this matter with sensitivity and understanding:

  • Start with Open Dialogue: Begin by expressing your feelings honestly, sharing why you find stockings appealing, and how they could enhance your intimate moments together due to her enhanced sexuality.
  • Listen Actively: Encourage her to share her thoughts and feelings without interruption or judgment, and let her know you genuinely value her perspective.
  • Address Her Concerns: Assure her that stockings come in a variety of styles and sizes, allowing her to choose what makes her feel most comfortable and confident.
  • Share Positive Experiences: If you’ve seen other women looking elegant and confident in stockings, share those instances with her, focusing on celebrating expression, individuality and different body types, not on your attention to other women.
  • Make sure she gets that it’s not “the stockings” that you find sexy, but HER wearing them (that’s a big one and an easy hole to fall down). Make it about enhancing her sexuality and appeal (like her enjoying nice clothes – this is clothing after all).
  • Don’t fall into the trap of stockings being a “bedroom only” thing. Nice as that is, you want her wearing them outdoors, right? She’ll need the confidence to do that.

Baby Steps

Don’t throw her in at the deep end. Getting her to wear any stockings at all is the first step. You’re not going to get her in RHT, seamed stockings, suspenders, and a mini skirt overnight. Start off easy. Maybe hold-ups under a long skirt or maxi dress. Compliment her often. Make sure you show your appreciation (you know what I mean) at the end of the evening. Carrot and stick, you know? You got something you like, make sure she gets everything she likes. It won’t take her long to make the connection. Next time, raise the hemline a bit. Later on, in a quiet place, ask her for a little flash of her stocking tops. Let her know how good she looks. Keep raising the bar a little and building her confidence. Slowly, slowly catchee monkey.

Buying the Right Stuff

So you want to know how to persuade your wife or girlfriend to wear stockings? If she has slim thighs (or likes shorter skirts), get her stockings with a narrower welt. If she has chunky thighs, get her stockings with a deeper welt. You love her legs, right? Make sure you get her what suits her and her shape. Be informed. Look at girls her size on Instagram to see how they look good. Big girls need deeper welts to make it visually pleasing. A chunky girl is going to complain about a narrow welt or the wrong size cutting into her thighs too. That will put her off. Make sure to buy the right size. Look at the sizing charts on websites. Read the reviews to know if that brand runs true to size. Know her dress size, shoe size, and height.

Overcoming Objections Respectfully

Let’s debunk some misconceptions:

  • Challenging Stereotypes: Emphasise that stockings are no longer old-fashioned; they are at the cutting edge of fashion with a renaissance of vintage and glamorous styles, making a stunning comeback.
  • Fashion-forward Choices: Today’s stockings come in a wide array of trendy designs, blending vintage aesthetics with contemporary fashion, suitable for any occasion.
  • Age-Appropriate Examples: Avoid showing images of younger women when discussing their appeal. Instead, find pictures of women her age or older (or uglier) looking fabulous and confident in stockings if you feel the need to offer examples. In other words, if she is 50, don’t show her photos of some 20-year-old hottie on Instagram.
  • Be honest: If stockings are really your “thing” or your fetish, tell her about it. She might surprise you if you open your heart about what you like, and how you’d love to see HER in them.

Give her an unlimited budget at your expense for stockings. Avoid cheap rubbish like Ann Summers and supermarket brands. Don’t have her wear cheap stockings or suspender belts. It pays off to pay more for quality. Avoid the cheap stuff you’ll find on places like Boohoo, Amazon, eBay, Primark or the local supermarket. Supermarket own brand stockings or cheap online ones are usually not that great. Similarly, much of the stuff you will buy at places like Ann Summers will also be of inferior quality and only good for bedroom fun and games, not for frequent comfortable wear.

When buying stockings or hold-ups, stick to good brands. That means brands like Dim, Pretty Polly, Charnos, Falke, Gabriella, Gio, Trasparenze, Veneziana, Oroblu and Aristoc. In general terms, French and Italian stockings tend to be good quality. Many Polish ones are good quality and quite affordable too as lots of girls wear stockings there.

Cheap suspender belts will have four straps as standard and plastic clips. They aren’t much use. Many women prefer a six-strap suspender belt for more security and comfort. Six straps will usually be enough. In short, be prepared to spend a few quid on the good stuff for your lady, guys. £10-25 isn’t unreasonable for a good pair of stockings. If you go down the rabbit hole, you can spend a lot of money on this stuff. Especially if you want genuine vintage stuff as many do. Make sure she has a spare pair in her bag in case she ladders one too.

It is entirely natural for her to want to please her boyfriend or husband (if not, find out why not), as it fosters a sense of connection and affection.


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Wanting to make your partner happy is a fundamental aspect of nurturing a loving bond. One way to express this care and consideration is by wearing something that he enjoys seeing you in, like stockings. It becomes an extension of your affection. Her choosing to wear stockings that you find appealing is a beautiful way to strengthen intimacy and deepen the emotional connection between you, reinforcing the notion that a small gesture can go a long way in nurturing a loving relationship.

Be informed about the objections you are likely to hear. If she is worried about showing her stocking tops, read this article here. If she is worried about social attitudes, why be put in a box by society? Read this article here to see how stockings are viewed in some other countries. Nowhere to wear them? How about jiving? Read this article here. Can’t dance? Why not learn? read this article about that. Find a resource near you. There will be some.

So you want to know how to persuade your wife or girlfriend to wear stockings? Overcome her objections.

Put the boot on the other foot. Try this analogy: If she told you that she finds you very attractive (wink wink) in say, snug white underpants, rigger boots and faded jeans, you’d be off down the shops for some stonewashed strides, a pair of orange boots and a few pairs of tighty whiteys in a heartbeat, wouldn’t you? Because you know it will probably mean some good quality sex if you wear something that turns her on.

That should be the same in reverse, no? Offer to do the same. Find out what flicks her switch, buy it and wear it. Then ask her to reciprocate.

How to Persuade Your Wife or Girlfriend to Wear Stockings

Objectifying Women

This is a common gripe, especially among feminists. Here is your argument against that: Asking a woman to wear stockings is a matter of personal preference or even an exploration of shared desires in a relationship. It’s essential to recognise that when done with respect and genuine affection, this request does not inherently objectify her. In a healthy relationship, both partners communicate openly about their desires and boundaries, fostering an environment of trust and mutual understanding. Viewing a woman’s choice to wear stockings as an objectification would oversimplify the complexity of human relationships and overlook the shared agency and consent that underpins such requests. Instead, it can be seen as an expression of intimacy and appreciation for her individuality, further deepening the emotional connection between partners.

Emphasising Mutual Pleasure and Intimacy

Now, let’s focus on how stockings can strengthen your connection:

  • Deepening Your Bond: Wearing stockings can add a spark of excitement to your relationship, making your intimate moments even more fulfilling and enjoyable.
  • The Joy of Give-and-Take: Remind her that a healthy relationship involves partners engaging in activities that bring joy and fulfillment to each other.
  • Boosting Confidence: Share how wearing stockings can make her feel sexier and more confident, even if they’re not visible to anyone else.

That said, she might just enjoy teasing you a bit with her little secret.

How to Persuade Your Wife or Girlfriend to Wear Stockings

Exploring the World of Stockings

Let’s take a closer look at the fascinating world of stockings:

  • Hold-Up Stockings vs. Stockings with Suspenders: Explain the difference between these two types of stockings, allowing her to choose the style that aligns with her comfort and preferences.
  • Diverse Lingerie Options: Introduce her to popular lingerie brands like What Katie Did, Cervin and Mason Stockings, showcasing the variety available to suit different tastes and occasions.
  • Acknowledging the Rising Popularity: Point out that the demand for stockings and different lingerie sizes is considerable, evident from the numerous websites catering to these preferences.


So you want to know how to persuade your wife or girlfriend to wear stockings? You’re all set to approach the topic of stockings with your partner like a pro. Remember, respect, empathy, and open communication is the way to go. Focus on enhancing your intimacy and celebrating each other’s desires. Stockings can be a fantastic addition to your relationship, empowering her with confidence and allure. So, who knows, she might even enjoy flashing her stocking tops so much that she starts her own Instagram page, playfully showcasing her newfound enthusiasm. Best of luck on your exciting journey of nurturing intimacy with stockings.

Comments, questions, and observations are welcome in the comment box below.

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